Love can truly heal a wounded heart.
Seven months ago my mom died of heart failure. We did the best way we can to saved her but we failed. Not because we are failures but she simply wanted to leave, not because she doesn't love us anymore but she simply does not want to cause us so much pain.
For several months now I was really wondering why things could happen in just a blink of an eye. I cannot fathom the experience seeing my mother dying in our arms and before our very eyes. I cannot forget the way she looked. Grasping for air, feeling the pain and crying because of misery. Nobody wants to die that way. Not even me. I wish I was able to see her in complete serenity during the last days of her life. I wish I was a perfect daughter for her. There are a lot of things that I wish I was able to do. But I was too late.
Many people keep on bombarding me, saying that life has to go on. I am trying to go on. I am moving on but I can simply say that no matter how much effort I have exerted there are some things that are beyond my control. I am trying so hard not to feel the pain anymore. I know that the pain will always be there. After all she is my mother.
I know that I will always be needing my mother. I will surely miss her everyday.