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Lessons of Life

Reality bites

By: MARLENE ADLIT | Published: 09/10/2010 08:22 | | Content:16
Page [1 2 ]
MARLENE ADLIT
MARLENE ADLIT
What is love? One of the few questions that we need to know. Since we were little kids we encountered this question a lot of times.

Dictionaries have different meanings for this word. But when I think about this word, my mind conjures up images of all kinds of beautiful things that I have always associated with this word. Flowers, chocolates, candle light dinners, hearts, soft toys, clothes and perfumes, (I hope I havent left anything out!) these are the words that have become synonymous with lovebut, what about the feelings and emotions associated with this word!

I remember growing up with stars in my eyes and love songs ringing through my ears. Slowly my dreams grew bigger and I started waiting for my Prince Charming to come along and take me with him to a beautiful land where we would be surrounded by servants, good clothes, flowers and jewelry. One day I realized the truth about love...that it was much more than material comforts and gains.

Love is Sharing

Believe me when I say that this is one of the most important ingredients of love. It is important to open ones heart and share pain, joy, success and failure, it really does not matter, as long as the heart is clear. Love is being honest and knowing that the other person feels the same way too, it is sharing and losing ones inhibitions and knowing that the person on the other side will never be judgmental. 

Love is Talking

Yes, love is talking. It is about speaking, telling and sharing. After some time people restrict their conversations to discussing bills, children and pets. This is a sure indicator of things going down hill. Bring the spark back by starting a conversation. 

Love is Spending Time Together

A few minutes spent together everyday keeps the boredom away. I just made this up right now, but it is because I feel there is nothing like time invested in a relationshipbelieve me, it pays! Heavy work schedules take up much time and effort, so it is important to get things into perspective.

Love is Faithfulness

To love means to be true, to love unconditionally means to give with all your heart to one, and only one. Love is when you realize that he/she is the best thing that has happened to you and you want to cherish that person and the moments spent with him/her till death do you part.

Love is Being Friends

Love is being friends with each other. Enjoying simple pleasures in life like shopping, catching a movie or watching television at home, apart from a host of other things that "Friends" normally do!

Love is Looking Together in the Same Direction

This may sound clichéd, but it is truelove is having the same goals and taking steps in that direction to make them come true. 

I would like to end with one of my favorite quotations

"Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly and without law, and must be plucked where it is found, and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration."
D. H. Lawrence
Comments
Shannen Claire Gado (no registrado)
Shannen Claire Gado (no registrado)
Wow naman ma'am... :)
katherine mendoza (no registrado)
katherine mendoza (no registrado)
in love k b girl?
but i love it, even though i don't know when will it come to my life again..
i just know about love to my family and friends, almost forgot about having a relationship with someone again...

hope that this article will help me...
echosersang froglet nho..
emo lng,
Cherry Rose CoLao (no registrado)
Cherry Rose CoLao (no registrado)
anu yun..?hehe...in love si marlene adlit..?hehe happy valentines day girl...the best ka,,,
khay (no registrado)
khay (no registrado)
Ma, I love all of your definition about love...Nandyan na lahat. Miss you,mwah...tc
Kia Guerrero (no registrado)
Kia Guerrero (no registrado)
Hmmm...love!
Grabe,Ms. Marlene, b best and definitions
nyo for love.
Super agree po ako to all of that!
MARLENE ADLIT
MARLENE ADLIT

          I was walking along a dark empty street when flashes of memories crossed my mind. Indeed, time flies so fast. Days change as hasty as we flip the pages of a book. Time is something so precious which we should value and give importance to. Time is something that we could not take back once it was lost.

 

          My mom will be celebrating her sixtieth birthday on the 28th day of October. But she wouldnt be around. Almost a year ago she died of heart attack and multiple organ failure.  She expired fifteen days after her fifty ninth birthday.

 

          Its been a year, yet I dont know how I was able to survive the days knowing that she wouldnt be coming back anymore. I always think of the happy moments I had with her, still the incidence of the last sixteen hours of my life with her keeps coming back on my mind like a ray of light that flickers in the sky.

 

          I clearly remembered how her illness caused her so much pain and suffering. The vision of those machines and other equipments that almost broke down her body, the respirators, oxygen tank, catheter and needles are among the nightmares that keep on haunting me. They are like ghosts floating in the air.

 

          It had been very traumatic not just to me and to my siblings but to my father as well. That last sixteen hour roller coaster event shadowed all the supposed happy times I had with her. What I know is that, I wasnt ready to lose her. I came to a point wherein Im willing to trade everything and anything within my power just to keep her alive. But still, I cannot compete with God. And I cannot question his will. So thy will be done.

 

          A year had passed, and we celebrated all the important occasions without her for the first time. We cried on our first Christmas and New Year away from her, because she was not with us. We dont felt like celebrating at all. But we have to; because we know that it was what she wanted. Also, the celebration of mother's day struck me. I was able to say "happy mother's day Ma", I hope you're happy wherever you are. I shed a river of tears knowing that the person I was supposed to greet was no longer there. Another one was when I celebrated my first birthday without her. It was very frustrating and disappointing because no one greeted me the moment I woke up to say happy birthday, because shes not there. Shes no longer around. It just then I realized that indeed shes gone, and she wouldnt be coming back anymore. Undeniably, reality bites and it hurts so much. It squeezes and rips my heart out. Words are not enough to describe the twinge and pain I felt inside my heart.

 

          Despite and in spite of the pain, I know for a fact that on the 12th day of November we have to move forward to the new chapter of our lives.  The pain, sadness, frustration and regrets will always be there. But we have to bear in mind that our lives did not end as our mothers life ended. But we are human and we are not formidable that is why we cannot shield and protect ourselves from all the negative emotions that this world could offer.

 

          I am in PAIN because I cannot control my heart to feel what it feels. I feel SAD because I lost a very important and special someone. I lost my pillar of strength. I lost my confidante. I lost my mother.  I am FRUSTRATED because I cannot help but be disappointed due to the turning point of events. I am mad, but to whom? I want to blame someone, but who? And I have REGRETS because I know that I was never been a good daughter to her. I am not the ideal daughter that a parent could have. I wish I had been the perfect daughter for her, but I wasnt. If only God turns back the time, if only I could change what happened, maybe things will be different. 

 

          And because of this catastrophic episode of my life, I have learned the best thing in the world; it was when tragedy taught me to put love ahead of everything. 

Comments
_akosidarna_
_akosidarna_
love heals all wounds have faith
MARLENE ADLIT
MARLENE ADLIT

          There are a lot of things that define our happiness. Happiness is bliss of pleasure that we felt if we know that deep within our heart we are contented and delighted.

          Last October 16, I had a great time with my high school classmates and batchmates. It was something so typical yet I was looking forward too. My intention was to meet them and have some kind of kamustahan while having fun. It was really great meeting them again after a long time. Though we were not able to gather the supposed target attendees, still it was fun. The experience was full of laughter and mirth.

          There were a lot of candid moments. Really candid that we never cared less whether we look stupid or not. What we know was we were having fun, fun, and fun. The link and connection between us all was a grand hit. No one was left behind. Everyone was equal. And I assumed and I presumed that all of us did have enjoyed that one night together.

          The best part of the event for me was encoding and listing down the incorrect incidence of the whole saga. Each person has their own form of being incorrect. First, for those who should be in the meeting place before six in the evening who did not arrive on time, well they were late comers (incorrect huh!). Second, the first venue was so crowded and too noisy thats why it left us no choice but to shout in order to understand each other. It was like everyone was deaf and we had to use sign language if we want to communicate (again, incorrect!). Amazing and so extravagant that we were able to practice are non verbal communication skills. During the transition period wherein we had decided to move to another place we hang around the malls parking lot. We had a good time bonding with Manong (oops I forgot to get his name) while waiting for a cab which unfortunately did not come (another incorrect). When we were in the new venue the eatnuman which others were mistaken and called it eatlugan (hahaha, funny), I might say that the place was very homey and had a vibrant ambiance. It was something so unique and native. In there, our enjoyment was overflowing. Hence, of course there were various incorrect but just for the sake of fun. Since Joel Batusin was too drunk by drinking soda and water, he mistook the ashtray for a dish plate (harhar, so incorrect and labeled as no social graces). Next was the legend of the mahiwagang banig as our very own version of magic carpet. Well I guess it made us fly, or were just too drunk to justify (incorrect one more time). If there was a magic carpet, of course there was a Genie in a bottle. But find out what was the content of the mysterious bottle (for the nth time very incorrect). But honestly, all of us fell in love with that bottle (called Wife Ko). The left over did not even miss out (hey give it to the dogs). Lastly, when I realized how poor I was in dealing with simple math problems (heck who cares, its the mere reason why I concentrated in English).

          It was among the once in a lifetime chance to be with them so I might treasure my special moment with them. No one knows that maybe next time a new bunch of people will be there. To Mhy, Baste, Emilene, Dan, Joel, She, Aris, Maan, Almer, Tope, my Prom King and Dariz guys I do had a great time being with you. Until next timeHasta la proxima vez.

MARLENE ADLIT
MARLENE ADLIT

Losing someone or something you love is very painful. After a significant loss, you may experience all kinds of difficult and surprising emotions, such as shock, anger, and guilt.  Sometimes it may feel like the sadness will never let up. While these feelings can be frightening and overwhelming, they are normal reactions to loss. Accepting them as part of the grieving process and allowing yourself to feel what you feel is necessary for healing.

There is no right or wrong way to grieve but there are healthy ways to cope with the pain. You can get through it! Grief that is expressed and experienced has a potential for healing that eventually can strengthen and enrich life.

Grieving is a personal and highly individual experience. How you grieve depends on many factors, including your personality and coping style, your life experience, your faith, and the nature of the loss. The grieving process takes time. Healing happens gradually; it cant be forced or hurried and there is no normal timetable for grieving. Some people start to feel better in weeks or months. For others, the grieving process is measured in years. Whatever your grief experience, its important to be patient with yourself and allow the process to naturally unfold.

I felt the same way too when I lost my mom. I know that no amount of words can ease the pain. But I believe in you. I know that youll surpass all these trials. Anne, bear in mind that your life did not end as your grandmas life ended. The pain, sadness, frustration and regrets will always be there.

You are in PAIN and it is natural, because you cannot control your heart what it has to feel. You are SAD, of course who wouldnt be if you have lost the most important person in your life. You are FRUSTRATED and upset because of what had happened. And I know that you REGRET a lot of things because you were not able to do, give and attribute to her.

Anne if theres a possible way for me to emit or at least relieve the pain that you have right now, I will do it. I know its hard for you to lost your pillar of strength; it seems that you are a lost and wounded bird. But believe me youll get by. There are times that we seem not to know what we should do and what we should feel yet its normal. We are simply human being and bound with endless feelings and sentiments. We cannot shield and protect ourselves from all the negative emotions that this world could offer.

For that be strongtrust Him. He never fails. I hope that somehow I was able to help you. God bless.

 

 

 

 

MARLENE ADLIT
MARLENE ADLIT

The Apple Garden

(from the novel, Follow the Stars Home by Luaane Rice)

 

On the island in the sea,

Northward of the Gulf Streams flow,

That is where we came to be,

In the spot where apples grow.

 

Trees of green and walls of stone

Fill the land that I can see

Anne played there till she was grown

Tell me, what will be for me?

 

Back at home, my mother cries

My father lives beneath the waves

Tell me, does the one who tries

To love, succeed at being brave?

 

You see, Im just an apple girl

And someone came and picked me up

She polished me, just like a pearl

And set me in a loving cup.

 

In apple gardens, let me be

Beneath the stars and wind and sky

The constellation in the tree

Ill love my own life by and by.

 

 

          I have read this novel more than four years ago. I might say that at the very instant that I comprehend its content the message struck me. The poem represents profundity. I cannot fathom how a twelve-year-old girl could experience such malady. All of us has different story. It is a matter of how we perceive life in a positive perspective in order for us to attain an optimum level of living.

        Indeed each of us is an apple. There are good fruits which people care so much about. Perhaps, they brought it and sold in the market, and others which fell on the ground and left unnoticed. Those discriminated apples are usually the ones that are likely to be rotten. Rotten apples are usually the ones that no one cares and no one will surely like.

        Just like the girl in the poem my life had been a wretched. Like her I had been an apple girl. I know how it felt like to be lying on the ground, waiting to be noticed and picked up. Although I was on in years, I still felt vulnerable, as if I could fall way back down if I didnt take care of myself.

Like the withered apples I have grown to be the wisest. Eventually, the dried and unloved apples will be a remnant of a culturally made art. Though rotten and withered, someone happen to shape them into a brightly sparkling treasure.

        And for now I am waiting for that someone to come and pick me up, the one that could polish me and turn me into a precious pearl and someone that would set me in a loving cup.

 

 

 

(To those who have the same experience, I hope that I was able to inspire you. Always keep a good fight.)

         

MARLENE ADLIT
MARLENE ADLIT

        I dont know what got in to me but I felt like pouring my heart out. Ive been thinking and suffering this for days now. I know that I have hurt a lot of people in the past. I might give a lame excuse that it was one of the childish thing and all. But it is just now that I realize that somehow I need to make amends. I was always being judged and misunderstood. But people dont know me. They think that I am like this and like that but how well do they know me. They know nothing about me. What they see is the superficial outer appearance. No depth, no meaningpurely faade.

        I am so tired on explaining myself to everyone especially when they expect the worst in me and I emerge otherwise. I grew up knowing that we cannot please everybody. No matter how much effort we put in for the people around to appreciate us, it is still futile. Because they made their final judgment and they had given their verdict. It is like being treated a criminal knowing that you are innocent. More so, it doesnt really bother me what these people think of me not until that one unambiguous night. I dont know but I care for the opinion of this one particular person.

        I promised myself that if I will pour this out, I shouldnt cry. But I cant help it. Im not only pouring my thoughts but my emotions as well. People perceive me to be strong, but no one sees me cry. And writing is the only means I have now to unleash the pain I have inside.

        Ang sabi mo nasaktan kita noon, pero gusto kong malaman mo na hindi ako aware sa mga bagay na ginagawa ko noon. The word noon is an operative word--------meaning it happened in the past. Tapos na at nakalipas na. Kung balikan man natin sana sa paraang tinatawanan na lang natin. Im not saying that Im perfect and I made no wrong. Honestly I know that I made and I commit a lot of mistakes in my life. And I believe that it is a part of the learning process. Well maybe a spice to give flavor in my boring life.

        Pero ang issue ko, yung ngayon. This time ako naman ang nasasaktan mo. Hindi ka siguro aware at baka nga hindi mo alam pero ang sakit-sakit pala kapag sao nanggaling. Minsan iniisip ko na sana hindi ka na lang bumalik. Sana hindi na lang kita nakita ulit. At kung alam ko lang na masasaktan ako ng ganito, sana iba na lang yung nakaraan natin. I am not blaming you; I have no right to do that. Ito lang ang alam kong paraan to tell you what I truly feel. Though indirect, at least I tried. Wala naman akong lakas ng loob para sa confrontation. And if ever na malaman mo I will surely deny it. I still have my pride noh.

        Pero ang hirap pala, hindi ko alam na capable ka na paiyakin ako, wala kang kailangang gawin. The mere thought of losing you and never having you, truly hurts. Nakakainis ka kasi nasasaktan mo ako ng ganito. And worst hindi mo alam ang existence ng feelings ko sao. Bakit kasi kailangang may SIYA, sana ako na langsana ako na lang ulit. Pero wala naman akong magagawa di ba. I had my chance once and I blew it. And this is the price I pay.

        Im so sorry, hindi ko alam na all this time minahal pala kita. I know that Im too late but dont worry, I dont have any intention in ruining your harmonious relationship. Just dont stop me to feel the pain. I am shattered, broken into tiny bits of pieces. Allow me to heal and condole for the death of my heart. I know it takes time, yet I know that each time I got to see you; youll only made me cry.

        Alam ko selective ako. Sakit ko na to eh. Pero hindi ko kayang protektahan ang sarili ko para hindi masaktan. Tao lang ako, and vulnerable for that matter. Wala kang kasalanan at wala ka ring kailangang gawin. I made this choice, so be it. Ill bear it with all my heart and soul, kasi nga mahal kita. Ngayon alam mo na.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(para po ito sa taong nasaktan koIm sorry, if only I could turn back the time.)

 

       

Comments
_akosidarna_
_akosidarna_
minsan hindi tayo aware na may nasasaktan na pala tayo, pero hanggat kaya natin mag-sorry at tanggapin na mali tayo, walang gulo sa mundong ito.
MARLENE ADLIT
MARLENE ADLIT

      Love is a strong positive emotion of regard and affection. It also has something to do with passion and compassion. Love is indeed an infinite word. It is a word being uttered since the beginning of time.

      But if love truly exists, why do a lot of people in the world fall out of love? Many would say that they have a change of heart. Or simply, I dont know what happened but I just dont love him/her anymore.

      It is so frustrating and depressing to hear your love one tells you that he/she just dont love you anymore. It will surely rip my heart out and broke me into pieces. I dont believe that people could possibly be fall out of love. They simply made a choice. And that choice is to be with someone else.

      Three years ago I happened to read a book by Emily Giffin, Love The One You're With ---- is a beautiful story about a woman revisiting her feelings for an ex-boyfriend. It is a beautifully written story about a woman, Ellen, who is married to the brother of her college roommate and best friend. Her husband, Andy, is a caring, loving man. One day, Ellen runs into Leo, her most serious ex-boyfriend, on the street, and sits down with him for a small chat and some coffee.

Leo gives Ellen, a photographer, a professional lead that she would kill for. After much deliberation, she takes it up, deciding that no harm could come out of it. Until she finds out that Leo is writing the piece for which she is taking the pictures, and that they will be working together.

The series of events leads to Ellen and Leo revisiting their feelings for each other and Ellen wondering whether or not she made the right decision by marrying Andy.

The story is filled with incidents, which, if looked at individually, would make Ellen come across as a selfish, disloyal woman. But the character development has been so masterfully taken care of by the author that the readers can relate to Ellens character and understand her. The readers know why she is doing what she is doing, and understand that shes not selfish, shes only human. She is a human being with some flaws, just like everyone else.

The story is set mostly in Atlanta and New York City. The novel also nicely describes the contrasting ways of life in the two cities, the culture, the people, the sizes of their homes, and everything else. The narrative is such that readers can visualize almost everything they are reading about. They can feel the tension between the couple when they argue with each other. They can feel Ellens restlessness when she is out of work for a while.

This novel helps me realize that rekindling old flame is possible. However, it depends on the person on how he/she will handle things. The story can actually give hope to some struggling marriage life. And well, contentment can save your relationship.

Enjoy love, love and love...Happy Valentines!

 

 

Comments
_ding_ang_bato_
_ding_ang_bato_
truly, we should be happy and contented to whom we're with. kung nag-decide ka na makasama sya habang buhay dapat panindigan mo yon. your point is taken...
MARLENE ADLIT
MARLENE ADLIT

Christmas is the most awaited season each year. People are hopeful that they would spend it with their families and friends. Christmas or Christmas Day is a holiday observed generally on December 25 to commemorate the birth of Jesus, the central figure of Christianity. The date is not known to be the actual birthday of Jesus, and may have initially been chosen to correspond with either the day exactly nine months after Christians believe Jesus to have been conceived the date of the Roman winter solstice, or one of various ancient winter festivals. Christmas is central to the Christmas and holiday season, and in Christianity marks the beginning of the larger season of Christmastide, which lasts twelve days.

Although nominally a Christian holiday, Christmas is also celebrated by an increasing number of non-Christians worldwide, and many of its popular celebratory customs have pre-Christian or secular themes and origins. Popular modern customs of the holiday include gift-giving, music, an exchange of Christmas cards, church celebrations, a special meal, and the display of various decorations; including Christmas trees, lights, garlands, mistletoe, nativity scenes, and holly. In addition, several figures, known as Saint Nicholas, Father Christmas, and Santa Claus, among other names, are associated with bringing gifts to children during the Christmas season.

Because gift-giving and many other aspects of the Christmas festival involve heightened economic activity among both Christians and non-Christians, the holiday has become a significant event and a key sales period for retailers and businesses. The economic impact of Christmas is a factor that has grown steadily over the past few centuries in many regions of the world.

What is the true spirit of Christmas then? Among the economists it is the season of good business. It is purely commercialism. People would buy anything and give it as presents business, commercialism and materialism indeed.

When I was growing up, Christmas was my favorite holiday. I was a little fuzzy about the baby in the manger, but I knew all about Santa. I also knew there would be presents, lots of them. One of my annual pre-Christmas rituals was carefully going through the toy section of the nearest mall or perhaps wrote down my wish lists.

More often than not, my parents came through and I got what I wanted. But I usually had a big letdown when Christmas was over, because it meant that Christmas was whole year away. For a kid like me, whose philosophy was that it is more blessed to receive than to give, that was a lifetime.

My parents remind us that Christmas is about Christ, and that the presents under the tree reflect Gods greatest gift, the gift of his Son. But the message doesnt always get through.

Of course, Christmas materialism is also stoked by our modern consumer culture. The holiday accounts for about 25 percent of the nations annual retail sales. And some of the nations retailers are trying to have their Christmas fruitcake.
And just what are we doing with all this stuff, anyway? The so-called reality TV shows help people get rid of their junk. And 50 cities in 17 states have chapters of Clutterers Anonymous, which is modeled after Alcoholics Anonymous.

The classic movie Its a Wonderful Life told us that a bell rang whenever an angel earned his wings. Now the jingling you hear is probably from a cash register.

We Christians are right to be concerned that the culture is trying to take Christ out of Christmas. Lets just be sure that we dont bury him in an avalanche of our own holiday junk.

 

 

 

MARLENE ADLIT
MARLENE ADLIT

I always look forward to celebrate Christmas with my family and closest friends. I prepared presents and food to share. And for me, Christmas is the best time of the year to reunite, make amends and share the blessings you have.

Last year we almost forgot to celebrate Christmas because we were mourning for the lost of my mom. But we know that we have to move on and continue our lives. And without a doubt time really heals all wounds.

We are so grateful for all the prayers being offered to us by relatives and friends. Now, we can say that we are healed. We know for a fact that my mom will not coming back anymore. We cannot share special season like Christmas with her any longer. But even so, we know that shes just there watching over us and celebrating with us.

This year (2010), I never thought that I would go out of our home at exactly Christmas day. I spent Christmas day with someone else. But I might say that it was the best Christmas day I have. I dont want to express this in full detail. But it was the happiest day of my life. Maybe someone perceives me as stupid or imbecile but who cares. Im so happy and I know that Im alive. 

I never thought that the possibilities of this event could ever happen. I never expect it, even in my wildest dream. Yet, it just happen and comes out naturallyI might not know what lies ahead of us and whats with us but I am certain that there is something going on.

I am just hoping that __________ has the courage to tell me what is on __________ mind. I am not a fortune teller; I cannot make a wild guess on what you think. I just hope that you could clear things with me. Just dont let me left hanging. You know I have love you ever since.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(para sao to mahal, sana mabasa mo)

Comments
_i am lal_
_i am lal_
hi mahal...sana alam mo kung ano ang nararamdaman ko ngayon, feeling ko nasa cloud nine pa rin ako...hay kung alam mo lang, i love you talaga...
_ding_ang_bato_
_ding_ang_bato_
it seems that you have a great time with someone you obviously adore...keep it up, may he open his mind to some possibilities...
MARLENE ADLIT
MARLENE ADLIT

Fairy tales had been a part of me since time immemorial. I was a constant believer of this fantastic chronicle that enables me to find solitude every time I want to get away with the pain and twinge that this world had given me. I used to deem that there would be someone out there who would shelter and protect me from harm. My knight in shining armor, my hero is just around. 

When I was little I used to read stories about prince and princess. I used to believe that they are real and they do exist. And someday my own prince will come and I will be a princess.

There are a lot of tall tales that had been told. Numerous of them had been written in cave walls, buildings, libraries, and books. There were some that had been handed down from generations to generations. Yet, hundreds of them were not been told and written.

Lots of fascinating love stories was not known by many. They were not famous and unheard of. Among them were the love stories of our forefathers, our ancestors and immediate family members. And one of these stories is my very own version of love tales and saga.

I know that my story will never be written in the pages of books to unveil the truth between the happily-ever-after and not-meant-to-be sort of ending. My story had not started yet and I have a lot of days ahead. I cannot say that it would be a positive happily-ever-after tale or a negative not-meant-to-be ending. But I want to attribute this to the guy who made me believe in the existence of love and the one who completes me.

Twelve years ago, I met an extraordinary type of guy. Too extraordinary, that no amount of words could fit to describe him. Or maybe I couldnt just think of good adjectives to illustrate him in words. He imposed power and perfection. He was the hero that I used to read in books written by romance novelists. He captured me with his breath-taking smile. He was devilishly sweet and dangerous in a subtle way. How contradicting wasnt it? He acquired the characters and traits of vampires and wolves combined.

His name is JADE. His name speaks of his character. Jade is a unique gem of hardness, symbolic energy, beauty and a wide-ranging expressiveness. No wonder he held a special attraction to mankind.

I first met him when a common friend introduced us together. It was a great experience and a cliché of a roller-coaster ride. It was mind-boggling, emotion-draining and heart-warming sort of feeling. It seemed that the world stopped spinning. Or should I say my world stopped revolving.

He interests me and I was so curious. We used to see each other. We were always together, so inseparable. And the next thing I knew, we were enjoying each others company.

We had the same passion in music. He played the piano and I used to sing. It was our usual bonding moments. Music made us happy. I was a member of our Parish choir during that time. He even joined me in attending practices and rehearsals (though we have a different religion or should I say church dominion). He was so supportive and caring. Our bonding time wouldnt be complete without playing and singing our favorite song:

 

Its not the flower, wrapped in fancy paper

Its not the ring, I wear around my finger

Theres nothing in all the world I need

When I have you here beside me, here beside me

 

So you could give me wings to fly

Or catch me if I fall, or pull the stars down from the sky

So I could wish on them all

And I couldnt ask for more

Cause your love is the greatest gift of all.

 

          But then as the saying goes, some good things never last. A year after our unexpected acquaintance he called me up to say goodbye because they were moving to Canada. I wasnt aware that the word goodbye is a permanent thing. It was indeed the end.

I havent heard of him since then. As I have said, my love story hasnt started yet. Nevertheless, it doesnt have to end. I am writing this because it had been a part of my whims; however a part of me wanted to share with him what is inside my head. If only I could be given the chance to see him again maybe I will do the right thing. I know that I wasnt that nice back then but I do care. I also wanted to know what he had been to for the past twelve years. It wasnt really about how to start a new chapter of our lives but maybe to put closure. I know that I was too young then, but I kept my hearts promise.

I know that we have our own lives now. Things have change between us but even so I still wish to hear of him. Well for old time sake maybe or to know what I truly feel for him. Or perhaps its my way of knowing what he truly feels for me.

It is so complicated. Not that we complicate things but maybe its like starting all over again. What could be the possibilities if ever we meet again? Somehow it excites me. I know that there are a lot of unanswered questions in my head and once and for all I want to put this to end. Im not saying that I am positive to a happily-ever-after ending but I wanted to give it a try.

So my dear Jed, if ever you happened to read my journal by chance, dont hesitate to comment, commend and criticizethis is for you to know whats on my mind.

 

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